Step Out of Your Bubble

Leave. Get out! Most people want to travel and see the world. However, there are a select few who have no desire to do so. I have met people who don’t even feel the need to step out of their routine. Every time I travel I have always returned a different person. Recently, I have found myself in this rut of where I don’t want to step out of my comfort zone … literally. I spent the first 21 years of my life in the exact same city, in the exact same house, and I was terrified of moving to a new house let alone a new city. Well, about 6 years ago my family and I relocated to a city about an hour and a half away, not too bad right? Well, for me it was truly a culture shock!

I grew up in the San Francisco Bay Area, and if you’re familiar with the area it is a pretty diverse place. It’s where differences are celebrated and explored. Just moving an hour and a half away to a city just outside of the Bay Area, I found that I was in a different place culturally. After only being in this new city for a few days I experienced racism for the first time in my life. I was judged by what I looked like and it made me feel less than what I was. The kind of racism that I have only learned about when we would talk about Martin Luther King Jr., and I was being confronted for the first time in my life.

I was on my way to a family function with my parents. Before leaving the city we needed to get gas. At this point in the evening the gas station was crowded, and we had to wait for an available pump. Once the person was done and it was our turn to pull up to the pump, a man from the other direction pulled up and took it (truly something you would only see in a movie). Instead of starting a confrontation with this man, we went around the station and quietly took the pump behind his. My father went inside, and I started to pump the gas. The man then asked me if I knew how to read. Taken aback at this man’s question, I responded with a simple but confused, “yes.” The man then proceeded to tell me that I needed to go back to India. I was never angry at the man for what he said, but I was in a state of shock. What was in this man’s mind and heart for him to feel that it was ok to lash out at a complete stranger. I don’t even recall what I said to him, but I remember he was the one who sped off in a rage. Once he left, I looked around the gas station, and saw that I …. Yes ME…. I was getting dirty looks from my fellow brown colored folks. Oh yea … can you guess what the man’s skin color was? Go ahead, take a guess …. I dare you!

I have spent my entire live in this country, (minus a few months of travel) and for someone to tell me to go back to a place I have only visited was beyond my ability to understand. This entire spat came about because he did not want to give us a spot at the gas pump. He also made the assumption that I cannot read, clearly he has not been outside of his little bubble to even know that if we all simply went back to where we are from, none of us would be here, ESPECIALLY him. I do not think I was a victim of hate, but I do think that HE is a slave to his limiting beliefs, and felt that he in some way is superior to me.

Recently, I was approached by one of my students (I am a private tutor) with a question. His question was, “What are dreadlocks?” I told him what dreadlock were without any judgement because I am fully aware of the fact that I grew up and a very different environment. He then stated that he thought {insert description of cornrows here} were dreadlocks and I responded with, “Those are called cornrows.” His brother was shocked with my knowledge of different hairstyles and said, “how do you know all of this?” In the simplest response ever I said, “because I’m from the hood.” My childhood environment is what taught me these basic differences, and it would be strange had I not known. When you travel you learn different things and your perspective changes.

I spent a month in England a few years back and I learned so much about the culture. I even wanted to go to the grocery store. My aunt and uncle thought this was a bit odd, but you would be amazed at what you can learn from a basic activity such as grocery shopping. For example, in England, Costco doesn't give out free samples! What??? No samples?!?!?! Exactly my reaction! I also noticed that the shoppers are quieter, the only sound you could hear was of people pushing their carts, and putting food down. I felt like I was in a twilight zone … no one was interacting with one another. I almost felt bad for talking to my aunt and uncle. The produce section was more busy than any other part of the store… hummm interesting. I would not have made these observations had I decided not to join my aunt and uncle at the store.

Step out of your zone of comfort and explore what's out there, even if you're only going 1 hour away. Challenge your assumptions about other people, get rid of those stereotypes and limiting beliefs. The man at the gas station was talking to the child of immigrants, but an educated one. I do not know how much schooling he went through, but to assume that I cannot read was just rude and uncalled for. OUR perceptions of people based on their appearance is a reflection of how WE think and see the world. You can decide if you see the world in shades of grey or you can see the world in vibrant colors of the rainbow. You decide.