I feel like my Bio for EVERYTHING … social media … this blog ... HELL Even my resume… I need to put very clearly that I am a tall individual. I mean I get it, I am quite tall for the average human being, but for someone who has been tall my entire life the conversation gets old!! As a child I remember being approached by some old Indian aunties and being told that I needed to stop growing or else it would be hard to find me a suitor. This never really made sense to me, but it did shape my view of the world. I was brought up with the conditioning that whoever I marry has to be taller than me. This is not just an Indian thought, cross culturally the man is supposed to be taller…. Right? Let’s pull a part this little idea, shall we?
Recently, I was approached with a photograph of a potential suitor. The only additional information I was given about the individual was “he’s tall as well.” This comment gets me every single time. Yup … yup, because that’s the only quality I look for in a man! It’s doesn't matter if he eats babies, or brushes his teeth with chicken bones (what?...idk just go with it)... the point is he just needs to be taller than me. I wonder if shorter girls hear the same thing … (feel free to chime in, comments are below!). I would also like to point out that I have been approached about suitors for more than a decade and it’s the same thing … the Aunties really need to up their game!!!!
The more I go through life, it becomes more apparent to me that this is not an Indian thing. No matter who I encounter, the first thing they notice is that I am tall… understandably so … However, take note of this… I’ve been this tall for majority of my life and I don’t need people telling me. What if every person who came up to you pointed out that hairy mole on your forehead? I recall being asked, “How do you like being tall?” I was confused by the question and responded with, “Great! I’ve never been short, so I don’t have much to compare to.” Now imagine that same question but with the hairy mole…. Yea, I hope you see my point. Ok, maybe the mole is not the best example, because you have the option of removing it, whereas my height is not going anywhere … I can’t surgically remove that … right? The point that I am making is (not sure how well… ), telling me I’m tall is like when you turn on the news during a heatwave, and all the top story is “it’s hot” .. as if I couldn’t figure that out for myself.
Back to the bigger picture. About a year ago I went on a little excursion with a friend to San Francisco. The weather was great and we were just having a walk around Chinatown when this gentleman approached us. He was being very flirty and I knew something was coming. As the conversation progressed, this guy asked me if I would ever date a guy shorter than me. I honestly did not know how to handle this comment. Usually I have a whole bunch of responses lined up (as I pointed out … I get this all the time) … but that was a new question. In my past experience, it is an unspoken rule that a shorter guy is not possible. In the split second I thought of all implications each answer had. Had I said “no,” that could imply that I care about the other person’s physical characteristics. Had I said “yes,” that could have been an open invitation for this person to continue to hit on me … (Yes, I thought all of this in that split second). After this encounter, I wondered does height really matter? I don’t believe this is a topic of concern for same sex couples, right? And why did I care what he thought of my answer?
Short answer … no, height doesn’t matter.
However, we never settle for the short answers here! Ultimately the hope for these suitors and relationships are to result in love. Ever hear, “love is blind?” BULLSH*T! Love sees all, love knows no boundaries. When you truly love someone or something and it's unconditional, it does not hold any judgement. If you are to love someone with all of your soul then you must work to uncover all of the layers that have been place between the outer shell and the true essence of that human being. It won’t matter if the other person tall, short, fat, skinny … well we’re all skinny, skin is our biggest organ … love is limitless. If you are truly open it won’t matter what is on the outside. So does it matter if the “wrong” person is the tall one…?